I’ve heard this quote before; however, it means more to me in the recent past. As a “straight acting” gay guy, I have always been quiet about who I am. I think I may have just realized just that. I am who I am and nothing can change that and people can either like it or not, regardless I can’t change it. I feel like an empty broken bird egg, nothing inside, but something on the outside that resembles something. I have almost to a point grown mad about myself for allowing society to shape who I am. Since I have realized this, I don’t feel that I need to hide who I am. Don’t get me wrong I’m not going to go right out and get a LOGO or a HRC (Human Rights Campaign) bumper sticker and wear a sign on my back letting everyone know. What I have decided is to not deny or lie about who I am any longer. (well maybe except my family for right now) I have not had many instances where people have questioned my sexuality, but I will not any longer continue to mask it or hide it. Stopping heroin has really made me start to feel again. Suboxone has been the tool I was never given to help me realize a few things about who I am. I have been in cognitive therapy (Shrink) now for over a year, I do think I have had some success with this. I have been to two different doctors (PhD) and this last doctor that I have found has been a life saver. Although my sexuality has not come up, nor have I offered it; however, when it does I will be straight up with him about it. I don’t think I am ready to let the parents know, because I know this is every parents fear. Thank God I have a great set of parents who will love and accept me, and love me unconditionally when I do let them know, I just have not found the right approach yet, and quite frankly I am a little embarrassed about it. Two I don’t want my parents to think of me and sex in the same sentence, it kinda creeps me out. I am sick of denying who I am.
pol
Have you ever looked at your own sex in a sexual way?
(polls)
